The Mentoring Triangle: Role Play Exercise
Introducing a new relationship triangle
Mentoring Triangle is like a love triangle, but instead of romance, this triangle is all about the battle between the Mentor and the Saboteur for the Mentee’s attention and decision-making.
The Mentor is there to encourage, support, and help the Mentee take that big step forward, while the Saboteur—the sneaky voice of inside of us—tries to plant seeds of doubt and hesitation and undermine the Mentee’s confidence, keeping them stuck in their comfort zone.
The goal isn’t necessarily to convince the Mentee to make a decision, but to explore how hidden thoughts and self-doubt often influence the decisions we make without even realising it.
Why This Exercise Matters:
The Mentoring Triangle is more than just a role play—it’s a chance to explore how our subconscious thoughts influence decision-making, especially when faced with new opportunities. The Saboteur represents self-limiting beliefs, such as “I’m not good enough” or “What if I fail?”, that hold us back without us realising it.
In this exercise, you’ll see how these thoughts affect our decisions. The Mentor offers encouragement, but the aim is not to “win” the Mentee over—it’s about recognising the Saboteur at play, understanding its impact on our choices, and learning how to respond in ways that empower us.
This exercise helps us become aware of the thoughts shaping our actions and teaches us how to challenge them. By identifying and responding to our Saboteurs, we can move from doubt and fear to growth and empowerment. The key takeaway is that we all have an inner voice that can either hold us back or push us forward—and now, we can learn to respond in ways that support our growth.
Group Setup:
You’ll be split into groups of three: One Mentor, One Mentee, One Saboteur
Reading Time (5 minutes):
Each group will receive a scenario with a description of the Mentee’s background and the mobility program they’re considering. The Mentee and Mentor will read through the scenario information. Here’s the fun part: only the Saboteur gets to read their own special “Saboteur thoughts,” which are secret negative ideas designed to hinder the Mentee’s progress. The Mentor and Mentee won’t know what the Saboteur has planned until the role play begins!Role Play (10 minutes):
The Mentor will try their best to inspire, encourage, and support the Mentee to take part in the mobility program, offering solutions and reassurance along the way. The Mentee will play their part by raising questions, expressing excitement, and sharing concerns in line with their character’s situation. Here’s where the Saboteur comes in: the Saboteur can interrupt twice during the conversation, bringing up negative thoughts and doubts in an attempt to sidetrack the Mentee. However, there’s a catch: the Saboteur and Mentor cannot directly communicate with each other. It’s all about creating a dynamic where the Mentee has to respond to both the Mentor’s encouragement and the Saboteur’s distractions.Reflection (5 minutes):
After the role play, it’s time to step out of character and reflect on what just happened. This isn’t about whether the Mentor successfully convinces the Mentee to join the program; instead, it’s about understanding how hidden thoughts and subconscious patterns affect decision-making. You’ll discuss how the Saboteur’s thoughts—like self-doubt, fear of failure, and negative assumptions—often surface when we’re about to make a positive change. These voices can be incredibly powerful, but we often don’t realise how much they influence us. The goal of the exercise is to recognize these hidden patterns at play and learn how to respond to them in a healthy, productive way. How can we manage our inner saboteur, instead of letting it dictate our choices?
Scenario
